And that's the truth! My little 'un has just turned one and my hopes of getting on here every month never quite happened! It is true what they say it really is the hardest but the most rewarding job I have ever had. That isn't to say though that as many of us head back to work proper now our children are 1 (me included fingers crossed) we should feel a wave of guilt. As I say it's really hard work! On two levels, as I have blogged before it can at times be quite monotonous and every stay at home parent I've spoken to has said that. It is also hard when you've been a well groomed person and then because you now have your baby to put first your lucky if you even get to brush your hair in the morning. Secondly it's hard because you can't always take five minutes out when your looking after a baby/young toddler whilst you can at work no matter how mad the day. I often find 3 hours have passed and I've literally not stopped but as my child happily plays beside me in their playpen (crawling in earnest at the moment) I know that they are growing and are developing into this wonderful person which is so worth the hectic days it but that doesn't mean I don't have my own goals and actively want to achieve them. I am a great believer in happy parent happy child, if you want to stay at home until your child heads to Uni and you are happy and stimulated doing that then that's great but if you want to have 'something else' in your life and you've weighed up the pros and cons then go for it. One of the biggest things I have learned in this last year is to trust your instincts and don't get stressed about what another parent/child is or isn't doing. I can't honestly say that prior to having a child I didn't make assumptions because I did. What's the saying 'walk a mile in someone else's shoes?' I still don't agree with everything I see/hear parents doing but following my own advice it's unlikely to be any of my business I suppose!
That's pretty much it then, my plan was to blog for the first year, I hope this blog has been interesting or of use or both. Finally good luck - it's not easy, that much is true but most of the time its brill.
Friday, 16 September 2011
Thursday, 14 April 2011
Am I still me?
Well my little baby is not so little anymore, coming up for seven months now. I ask the question, am I still me as I have found a definite dichotomy that comes with experience. On the one hand I have confidence, I'm in a routine, I know my baby, and I'm no longer, for the most part, running round in a blind panic. I've got it licked, sort of! So that's great but then on the other hand, I find myself living in a baby world. By this I mean, I know all the words to my baby's favourite TV shows, I even find myself singing them when baba's gone to bed whilst I'm doing the washing up or cooking the tea!
When I'm out and about with baba, I'm in baby world, it's hard not to be when you no longer have the independent use of your arms though, up hill and down dale I'll push that pram!
I also find myself when I'm tidying away baba's toys talking to baba about them. Now I know that's a good thing, I think you should engage with your child as much as you can; my point is though, it almost feels odd when I pick up a magazine for example or go out without baba; things I now realise I seriously took for granted before I had my baby.
I hope other mums or stay at home dads will understand what I mean. I imagine it's the same if you have any all consuming job, when you do something that's not related to the (baby) job, it feels a bit odd. I'm not for one second saying don't have 'you' time, it is vital for your sanity even if it is just a soak on a Saturday evening.
I'd never thought about this element of motherhood before I had a baby and whilst it's no issue, I do sometimes wonder whether I'll ever be able to switch on my 'career' brain again. Here's hoping!
When I'm out and about with baba, I'm in baby world, it's hard not to be when you no longer have the independent use of your arms though, up hill and down dale I'll push that pram!
I also find myself when I'm tidying away baba's toys talking to baba about them. Now I know that's a good thing, I think you should engage with your child as much as you can; my point is though, it almost feels odd when I pick up a magazine for example or go out without baba; things I now realise I seriously took for granted before I had my baby.
I hope other mums or stay at home dads will understand what I mean. I imagine it's the same if you have any all consuming job, when you do something that's not related to the (baby) job, it feels a bit odd. I'm not for one second saying don't have 'you' time, it is vital for your sanity even if it is just a soak on a Saturday evening.
I'd never thought about this element of motherhood before I had a baby and whilst it's no issue, I do sometimes wonder whether I'll ever be able to switch on my 'career' brain again. Here's hoping!
Wednesday, 16 February 2011
The Power of 3
It's very easy to think that you have to be all things to all men (or babies) but that only leads to one of two things; burnout or being so fed up you start to resent your new job.
It's therefore important I believe, to utilise what and who you have around you, especially in the winter months when you may at some point be under the weather.
This starts with your baby. My baba is now 5 months old and really into their toys perhaps more so than I'd realised. It's therefore possible on occasion, to sit down on the sofa and 'chill' for 20 minutes or so whilst baba sits close by in their bouncer playing with their latest toy. They know your close by but it gives you an opportunity to just have a proper sit down, maybe just enjoying a cup of tea. You don't always have to be within 2" of your baby. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this happens everyday, or even every week! My point is, when it does happen, cease the moment; forget the washing/the washing up, it'll still be there in 20minutes (or leave it for hubby once in a blue moon)!
I've written before about the fact that yes your life changes when you have a child but it doesn't have to be baby baby 24/7. This, I know can easily be forgotten in the day to day routine (just managing to comb your hair sometimes seems like a personal acheivement) but it's something I stand by.
Now if your baba has not yet reached the age where they are really into their toys then this may be slightly different, but not, difficult. If all else fails, go back to the tried and tested, rest when they rest. Having recently had a winter sniffle myself I speak from experience; I just wanted to crawl into my bed and not get out all day! Obviously not possible but my cousin got me thinking, she said to make sure I rested or else it would take me longer to get better, I thought about this and then put it into practice. I took a step back and rather than continue on the 'merry - go - round' that can be motherhood, I stepped off, only for a little while, and have continued to do so where I can and you know what, my little baba is loving toy time!
It's therefore important I believe, to utilise what and who you have around you, especially in the winter months when you may at some point be under the weather.
This starts with your baby. My baba is now 5 months old and really into their toys perhaps more so than I'd realised. It's therefore possible on occasion, to sit down on the sofa and 'chill' for 20 minutes or so whilst baba sits close by in their bouncer playing with their latest toy. They know your close by but it gives you an opportunity to just have a proper sit down, maybe just enjoying a cup of tea. You don't always have to be within 2" of your baby. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this happens everyday, or even every week! My point is, when it does happen, cease the moment; forget the washing/the washing up, it'll still be there in 20minutes (or leave it for hubby once in a blue moon)!
I've written before about the fact that yes your life changes when you have a child but it doesn't have to be baby baby 24/7. This, I know can easily be forgotten in the day to day routine (just managing to comb your hair sometimes seems like a personal acheivement) but it's something I stand by.
Now if your baba has not yet reached the age where they are really into their toys then this may be slightly different, but not, difficult. If all else fails, go back to the tried and tested, rest when they rest. Having recently had a winter sniffle myself I speak from experience; I just wanted to crawl into my bed and not get out all day! Obviously not possible but my cousin got me thinking, she said to make sure I rested or else it would take me longer to get better, I thought about this and then put it into practice. I took a step back and rather than continue on the 'merry - go - round' that can be motherhood, I stepped off, only for a little while, and have continued to do so where I can and you know what, my little baba is loving toy time!
Monday, 10 January 2011
Getting back into it
Exercise that is! My baba is now 16 weeks old and this weekend I took the plunge and went for a 'power walk'. I used to be a very keen runner and wanted to get back into it. You have to find the right time for you though. I know there is a lot of debate about do celebrities put pressure on new mums to 'get fit quick' but for me it was about looking at my old clothes and thinking I used to fit into those!
Now I'm not fat, thankfully around the 20 week mark I went into overdrive with healthy eating and I think that stood me in good stead. Having said that I weighed myself at a friends the other day and I had put on 2 stone! In my defence though I am still breastfeeding and to that end at the moment much more than a power walk is not possible!
However it is a start, I also do a quick 15 minute pilates in the home whilst, for example baba is asleep. or in the evening when there in the land of nod.
It's not just been 16 weeks of course though since I did any exercise, more like a year, although I did complete a pre-natal specialist Pilaites DVD which kept me ticking over.
The point is it can be done, even if it's just 10 minutes a day, or at the weekends. I know it may sound awful but I'm only in my twenties and don't want to be one of those women that you see potentially of any age, that has clearly once had a nice figiure but has never got it back since having children and then bemoans it for the rest of their life!
As I say that may sound harsh but that image keeps me going as I pound the streets. I'm also a great believer that exercise is good for the mind endorphins and all that jazz. Finally having 10 minutes or half an hour just to yourself is wonderful and you shouldn't feel guilty!
I just wish I had a plan for getting rid of my stretch marks!
Now I'm not fat, thankfully around the 20 week mark I went into overdrive with healthy eating and I think that stood me in good stead. Having said that I weighed myself at a friends the other day and I had put on 2 stone! In my defence though I am still breastfeeding and to that end at the moment much more than a power walk is not possible!
However it is a start, I also do a quick 15 minute pilates in the home whilst, for example baba is asleep. or in the evening when there in the land of nod.
It's not just been 16 weeks of course though since I did any exercise, more like a year, although I did complete a pre-natal specialist Pilaites DVD which kept me ticking over.
The point is it can be done, even if it's just 10 minutes a day, or at the weekends. I know it may sound awful but I'm only in my twenties and don't want to be one of those women that you see potentially of any age, that has clearly once had a nice figiure but has never got it back since having children and then bemoans it for the rest of their life!
As I say that may sound harsh but that image keeps me going as I pound the streets. I'm also a great believer that exercise is good for the mind endorphins and all that jazz. Finally having 10 minutes or half an hour just to yourself is wonderful and you shouldn't feel guilty!
I just wish I had a plan for getting rid of my stretch marks!
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